There comes a point in every man’s life when he just doesn’t have the physical or mental energy to compete in the dating game; going out to some bar and paying for random women’s nine dollar drinks gets old. You want more, you need more. But, before you’re at piece with settling down, you have to make sure you’re in the right place to do so.
Back in the day, people used to date high school sweet hearts and live happily ever after – those days are long gone. Now there’s years of college, careers and temptations of social media combined with dating sites. This makes single life easier and necessary to hold onto into your mid to late twenties. Surrendering the bachelor card is hard to do, even though that day is virtually inevitable.
Along your journey you should have learned a few things, taking full advantage of your dating days. Now I’m using the term “dating” loosely here – serious relationships with these women aren’t necessary. The larger point being dating a wide variety of women can give a man great perspective as to what women want and what you need. Why is perspective important? Because a lot of men are arrogant and think they know it all. Or they’re too shy to ask questions and plead ignorance. Dating a plethora of women gives men actual knowledge and experience — not that false bravado crap so many of us cling onto.
What women would give you a well rounded perspective? Glad you asked. Definitely not saying you must date all of these types of women. In fact, many of them might screw up your head for a few weeks/months after. Take each experience with a grain of salt. Dating should be like a tryout and training experience. That way when you find the right one there’s no doubt, because you tried all the rest.
1.) The friend with benefits
This is usually someone your extremely comfortable with, which is an aspect everyone should look for in future relationships. Oh ya, and there’s the sex – that’s the glue that holds this partnership together. Combining good sex with being comfortable is always of utmost importance. The best thing about friends with benefits is the ability to say or communicate whatever you want without feeling as if you’re walking on egg shells. Both of you know the situation, so there’s a cool element of “this is wrong, but it feels so right.”
2.) The college coed
I’m not talking about dating college coed’s when you’re 19 or 20, more like when you’re in your mid to late 20’s. See, there’s a completely different feel to dating a younger women girl if you’re hovering around the age of 30. Hitting the fountain of youth adds a little pep in your step. That’ll be short lived though, because the fountain of youth only last so long before it drowns you in annoying problems and new pop culture references you can’t keep up with. Well, it was fun while it lasted.
3.) The “running out of time” girl
And you thought going to the free-throw line down by two with no time left on the clock was pressure. Try dating a girl in her late 20’s early 30’s who’s watching all her closest friends get married and have kids. She’ll put so much pressure on you to analyze your own life and future you could shit out a diamond. When she’s gone they’ll be a big sigh of relief. Although, as time passes they’ll be some truth to what she said. We could all use a swift kick in the ass from time to time – especially long-time bachelors
P.S. Watch out if she’s a maid of honor – she’ll reach stress levels you just can’t compete with.
4.) The divorcee
Getting the perspective of someone who walked down the aisle with who they thought was “the one” at the time can be eye opening (and a little bitter). This girl had her whole life planned around a single guy, then had to scrap the entire game plan – you don’t want to be that guy. The divorcee will eventually disclose what led to the downfall of her marriage. Take mental notes during this time, find out what not to do in a long-term relationship.
5.) The provocateur (one night stand)
Often times when you’re in the middle of a one night stand you know it (as does she). There’s something incredibly hot knowing this is the first and last time you’ll ever see or sleep with this girl. No need to save any tricks for a raining day, go balls out and give her everything you got (pun intended). Take that same reckless passion with you in future relationships. It’s sexy to let your primal instinct take over from time to time in the bedroom. The random one-night stand shouldn’t be the only woman to see that side of you.
6.) The cougar
Dating someone nearly double your age can be a bit intimidating at first, it can also be hotter than the sun. Stifler’s mom doesn’t just happen in the movies. Older women have seen it all and can tell you stories till the cows come home. They often have no filter and rarely over think things. They know what they want, how they like it and they’re not afraid to tell you. So stop over thinking, just react. Women love it when you take control. Plus the cougar will eat you alive if you don’t.
7.) The stage five clinger
Run. Seriously, run. It’s not worth the time and aggravation to put up with a girl who thinks the two of you are in a full blow relationship because a few too many Cape Codders inspired a drunken one-night stand. No brake pedal in her car – full tilt, full time. You can give all the hints in the world that there’s no interest in taking this “relationship” to the next level. Why is this a good lesson for us men? Because when we really, really like a girl we can be that stage five clinger too. Remember guys, pump the breaks early on. Overly clingy is such a turn off.
8.) The one you should’ve never fell for
We can sense trouble from coming from a mile away; sometimes she’s so inviting we can’t help it. First you get lost in her eyes then her smile and before you know it you’re wrapped around her finger. At times it’s the best relationship and other times it’s the worst. You’ll never know where you stand and she’ll lead you on just enough to make you lose your mind. Friends will say let her go, but you can’t – not yet. Need to torture yourself more because you want what you can’t have and she’s sooo good in bed. Eventually she’ll make excuses of why she’s been flakey and fade you out like she did the rest. Leaving you with nothing but a mental highlight reel of your late night escapades and a heart filled with frustration. Trust that “sense” next time.
9.) The one that got away
This isn’t an enjoyable experience. Nothing worse than sitting around wondering what could have been. Things you’d do differently and what you’d say to her if she was here now. But all that’s long gone. The truth is she got away for various reasons – some of those were on her and I’m sure some of those were on you. The lesson here is to make sure this doesn’t happen again. When you find girl that gives you those same feelings, hold on and don’t let go.